Longing for Sunshine!

Okay....I'm over winter, I need some sunshine.  I am sitting at my desk looking out the window and all I see is darkness and clouds, and I can tell it is super cold out there. I am longing for sunshine. I am tired of wearing a coat, I am tired of scrapping my windows in the morning, I am tired of dreading going to the store because I know it is cold outside, I am tired of being tired, and I am tired of SNOW!!!  Right now it is 84 degrees in Port-au-Prince, Haiti, just saying. Right now it is 36 degrees with NO sunshine in sight. *sigh*

My birthday is in November and I really wanted a bike, but I knew I would not be able to ride until at least March, so Matt promised me I could get it in the Spring. I cannot wait to get it and get out in the sunshine and get some much needed exercise. I already know what bike I want. 

I want to be able to sit outside, soak up the sun and read.

I want to walk around my grandparents' pond.

I want to go to the zoo. 

I want to sweat.

I want to play fetch with my dog.

I want to wear tank tops and flip flops.

Although I am longing for these things and at the moment they seem no where in sight, I know they are coming. Tomorrow is the first day of March. When I hear the word March I get super excited because I know Spring will soon be here. Although I HATE winter with all of my being I am thankful for my warm coat, warm PJ's, heat in my car and home, a roof over my head and walls to keep the wind out, socks and shoes, hot coffee, chili, and so much more.

Sometimes we need to rant on about the things we are wanting, but in the midst of that rant it is SUPER important to be thankful for the things that we DO have at this moment. 

Thank You Lord for blessing me with the warm things that keep me comfortable during winter.

Until next time...I Thessalonians 5:18

 

Enjoy this picture of the sun!

 

One Year Down

Matt and I have been married for one whole year as of yesterday! It is unreal how fast the first year went. I know people say it goes by fast but I was not expecting it to go by that fast. Our first year of marriage has been great!

I am so thankful for the man Matt has become. He has become such a strong follower and believer in Christ. He pushes me to be a better person and Christian. His passion for helping others is unreal! The heart he has for animals makes me smile even thinking about it. He never says anything negative to me or about me. He is not perfect, but he is perfect for me.

We have been together for 5 years and it is crazy to think of all the stuff we have gone through together, deaths, disappointments, stress from school, defeats, heart ache, depression, anger, hatred, and so much more. Thinking about the negative things we have gone through also makes me think of the positive stuff we have gone through. Graduation from school, more laughter than could ever be counted, worship, accomplishments, new jobs, finding our true passions, music video filmed, CD recorded, lots of parties, lots of concerts, trips, lots of plays, and so much more.

When you have been together for 5 years it is easy to forget what brought you together in the first place, but I will never forget. The Lord wanted us to further His Kingdom together so he placed two very important things in our lives so that we could meet and fall in love.

1. Acting
2. Music

We met in an acting class in college and instantly became friends. His since of humor and hair is what I first noticed when I saw him the first time. He was super friendly to everyone and I knew we would be friends soon enough. At that moment of course I had no idea we would get married 4 years later. So acting is why we met and became friends, but music is why we went out on that first date.

It was club day at school and we were in charge of the Drama club table. Just the two of us for two hours...what were they expecting to happen? We instantly found out we had the same taste in music and it had been a HUGE part of our lives and who we were. A month later we went on our first date, and a week later we started dating. 

When we first met I was very very mildly warm in the faith and Matt was not! He taught me how to me myself AND a Christian, which was something I really struggled with.  I had a really rough childhood and did not fit in with the Christians I knew. But he taught me it doesn't matter what has happened to you or what you have done. I am so thankful that he never gave up on me!

I think the Lord everyday for the husband he has blessed me.  I cannot wait to see what the Lord has in store for us this year!!

Happy Anniversary to my one true love!

2007, one of our very first pictures as a "couple"

I would guess 2009

2009 at Agape

2010-Mission Trip

2011

2011-in a play

Wedding-2012

Honeymoon-2012

Honeymoon-2012

Trip to Branson-2012

Branson-2012

Last week, headed to a Beholder show

Last night, eating our wedding cake!

 Until next time...Ephesians 5:22-23

Beauty vs. Brokenness

This is my favorite picture I took while in Haiti. We were on a mountain driving and this was what was on the other side. Absolute beauty! When I look at this picture I think of the beauty Haiti holds

              And when I see pictures like this I think off all the brokenness Haiti holds

                                                                 Beauty

                                                and

                                                           Brokenness

Just like all of us, we all have beauty and brokenness. Every place in the world has beauty and brokenness. Jesus can take that brokenness and turn it into more beauty.

Until next time...Psalm 34:18

"Would you go back to Haiti?"

Yesterday not only did I get to talk to our church about my trip Haiti for 3 WHOLE minutes, but I got to talk at my step grandparents church for 45 WHOLE minutes. My Sunday was filled with talking about my favorite thing to talk about, a nap, pizza, homemade chicken noodles, & church with my grandma! Needless to say it was an AWESOME day. 

At our church they asked the 3 of us newbies to talk about our trip for 15 minutes all together. So me being so awesome at math that is 5 minutes a piece. For me to keep it to 5 minutes I knew would be a HUGE challenge, then I realized one of the people talking with me would talk longer than 5 minutes so I decided I needed to cut my time even shorter. I did not plan what I was going to say, I just knew it would fly. So I talked about what us women did while we were there, then talked about how it impacted me, and ended with the prayer that Haiti and the missionaries are needing. I was super nervous to talk at our church because it so big and formal AND we are streamed onto the radio station. Everyone said I did a good job (but they could have been lying.) 

In the evening I spoke at a church where I know very few people. My dad, step mom, grandma, mother-in-law, and my husband all came to watch me. It was so awesome having them there. I had up to an hour to speak, and I filled 45 minutes of that hour! I started with some history of Haiti, then went into my trip. I told them what we did there, what we saw, what I felt, who I met, and much more. I put a slide show of pictures together for both times. As the pictures were just scrolling behind me I could also see them on the screen in the back of the church, it was amazing seeing the people react to pictures. They would make a face of sadness, or shake their head at all the trash on the street. They would smile when they saw pictures of my students, or laugh when they saw a picture of the missionary kids playing.  Those are the exact same reactions I have when I think about those things or see the pictures. I love being able to share what the Lord in doing in Haiti through the missionaries.  Many people asked questions, which was awesome. When I was done someone came to me and asked if I would go again. My answer was..."in a heart beat."

I pray everyday for the Lord to send me back and for a longer period of time!

I ended both of my "speeches" like this...

"We all are not called to go overseas, and we all can't afford to send money overseas, but we all can pray. I encourage you  to pray for Haiti, pray for Brett & Angie & the other missionaries, we all can pray!"




Until next time...John 14:13-14






 

Valentine's Day

I love Valentine's day!! I have seen so many posts on Facebook about single people complaining about Valentines Day, and to be quite honest it's silly. Yes, Valentine's Day is a "made up" holiday that is all about love, and yes we would show our loved ones love 365 days a year, but why can't we have one day where it is 100% okay to be completely mushy, romantic, so in love you're silly without being criticized? Saying that Valentine's day is just another day and we should always show love is like saying birthdays are just days and we should celebrate like it's their birthday everyday.  Why not one day out of the year we 100% think about someone else, the person (or people) who hold our hearts? 

Yes, not everyone is in a "relationship," but we all have relationshipS, right? If you're single, dedicate V-day to your mom, dad, grandma, grandpa, best friend, brother, sister, or even your neighbor down the street. Or better yet, Jesus. Yes, Valentine's Day is just another day to spend money on useless things like flowers or chocolate, but why not take advantage of that to show your love for someone, even if it is not your spouse/boyfriend/girlfriend. Yes, show love all the other 364 days, but why not take ONE day to show even more love? What would that hurt?

I love love and when it is okay to talk about love, I'm going to take advantage of that opportunity and I suggest you should too.


Until next time...1 Corinthians 13:4-8

                                My Love...he is perfect!

Being Peter

Yesterday I got some news that instantly made me doubt. Doubt, doubt, doubt, doubt! Why do we doubt? I doubted for about 3 minutes then I thought of Peter. Jesus asked me to step out of the boat, so I did (faith), then as I was walking on the water I started to get nervous and took my eyes of Jesus and started to sink (doubt), and said "Lord, save me" (help), and Jesus said "O you of little faith, why did you doubt?" (Matt. 14:30-31.) 

I was doubting that even with Jesus I would not be able to accomplish what He has asked me to do...now that I write it down I think "whoa, was I really that stupid?" We doubt because we are human, we think that miracles don't happen in 2013, and we are dead wrong. God still heals, he still sends the things we need when we are drowning in our lives, when we can't pay the bills the money comes, when our marriages are failing He holds them together, when we have friends or families who are walking away from Him, He brings them back. He is faithful and never failing. 

He asked me to do something, I know in heart He has asked me to do it, so I plan to! And even when it seems over whelming and IMPOSSIBLE I have to remember that the same God that brought Lazarus back from the dead, helped Peter walk on the water, fed 5,000 people with 5 loaves and bread and 2 fish is on my side and it WILL happen. 

So step out of the boat, but once you're out of the boat keep your eyes on Jesus, don't get nervous and look away because you WILL sink. Jesus never told us a life with Him would be easy or always fun, it will be hard, and stressful, but do we really want life to be easy all the time? Easy means comfortable, I don't want to be comfortable, if going to the ends of the earth to further His kingdom and to "love the least of these," is uncomfortable I want to be so uncomfortable it hurts.

When I get scared or nervous or downright comfortable I think of eternity. I think about Heaven and who I'll see once I'm there. I'll see my great grandparents, I'll see Matt's grandma again & his grandma I have never met. I'll see the sweet babies who only lived to be babies, I'll see my best friend who died in 7th grade, I'll see people I have never met before but become close friends with, and most importantly I'll see Jesus! So being uncomfortable for a few short years on earth is sooooooo worth it to see those faces again or for the first time! I'll see Jesus!!!

 So will you step out of the boat, and once you're on the water what will you do?

Until next time...Matthew 14:22-36

Haiti on the heart

Everyday I think about my time in Haiti, everyday I talk about something to do with Haiti, everyday I look at at least one picture from Haiti, and everyday I pray for Haiti. I know many people are thinking "okay we get it, you went to Haiti", or "you were only there a week, get over it."  The truth is, I cant...I can't get over it.  God has destroyed my life..He has taken everything I thought I have ever wanted and put it on the back burner.  While I was in Haiti, I changed. I changed for the better. Before I left for Haiti I caught myself thinking about really wanting to start having kids soon, and now I keep thinking "I don't want kids right now, I want to be in Haiti."  I used to HATE geography and now I catch myself looking up maps online to learn as much as I can about the world we call home. I pray everyday that the Lord calls me back to Haiti, for longer than a week. Yes, I will go without my husband and a lot of people may think that is OUTRAGEOUS, but Matt and I are strong enough in our marriage, even after only a year to know it can work. We have pure trust and faith that the Lord as called me to go back, and that He will ALWAYS come through, meaning He will hold our marriage together, while I am gone. 
Little chocolate colored children with HUGE white smiles have stolen my heart, the beauty of the mountains and the ocean has overtaken my life, the shambles of the city has overtaken my mind, the language has made me want to study (for the first time EVER.)  Haiti is a broken place with so much potential I can't help but dream to be a small part of the BIG stuff the Lord is doing over there.  Please pray for Haiti!

Until next time...Proverbs 19:17

Stressed

The past few days I have been stressed to the max. Matt and I are moving in with my dad...AHHHH, we are trying to figure out our call for ministry, among other things. I am trying to calm down and fully rely on the Lord and just let Him be in control. This is much harder than it should be because one I am human and two because I am a female. 

So this week I have been upset, I have cried, Matt has been firm (which is what I need), and I have not leaned on the Lord as I should. Growing up is tough! I am learning that I just need to chill, I cannot be in control of everything. Life happens and it may not always be what we want to happen, but the Lord holds everything in his hands and I just have to be okay with it. 

Everything is turning out okay like it always does. We still have stuff to move but it is coming along. We are praying and study to hear the Lord's call. I know He has big plans for us as long as we are faithful and obedient.

Until next time..."He's got the whole world in His hands"