I'm Terrified!

I have been seriously stressing about raising the money I have to raise for my second trip to Haiti in 4 months! When I say that out loud it is unreal that I have only been home four months and I am already going back. This time, I am actually more anxious (in a bad way), scared, nervous, stressed, and doubtful than I was the first time. So, what is the difference, I have already been there once, right? Well, here is the difference....I'm going alone, I'll in a foreign country for 3 weeks, I won't see my husband for three weeks, I won't be making any money to help Matt pay bills, I leave in about a month! 

I know this is what i need to be doing, but when I constantly hear people whom I love act like it is the worst decision EVER made, it makes it hard. 

"Oh you're going back to Haiti, when?" 
"May"
"THIS MAY!?"
"Yup"
"For how long?"
"3 weeks"
"3 WEEKS??!?!?!"

And that is it, every time!! Am I making a mistake? Am I crazy? Why the heck am I doing this? 
NO, I'm not making a mistake! Yes, I am crazy! I am doing this because there are people in Haiti whom I love that need me, and to be honest, I need them!

Yes, I leave for Haiti in a little over a month, yes I just got back from Haiti in January, yes, I am leaving Matt here, yes, I'll be gone for three weeks, yes, I won't be making ANY money in those three weeks, and YES, I am crazy! 

Isn't life too short to live it any other way? God has asked me to go to Haiti for three weeks to help out a family whom has dropped EVERYTHING to live in a broken country forever! Isn't it the least I can do, to go help them when they asked for an extra set of hands to 3 weeks...ITS 3 WEEKS! In my whole life, it is 3 weeks!!!

So, it is 3 weeks, why is everyone asking like I have lost it?! Because it is terrifying! Let's be honest here...it is terrifying! It is terrifying to fly alone, to stay in a hotel in FL alone, to land in an airport where very few people speak my language, to make sure NO ONE takes my bags from me, because they will run with it, to be away from my family for 3 weeks, to miss my husband! To organize a whole program on my own, to eat strange things, IT IS TERRIFYING! 

But isn't doing something terrifying showing faith and trust?
Don't you think Peter was TERRIFIED to step out of the boat and walk to Jesus? (Matt. 14:22-23)
Don't you think Noah was TERRIFIED to tell everyone that water was going to fall from the sky for the first time EVER? (Genesis 5:32-10:1)
Don't you think Mary was TERRIFIED when an angel told her she was going to have the SON OF GOD!?(Luke 1:26-38)
Don't you think the Israelites were TERRIFIED to walk through the parted Red Sea? (Exodus 14)
Don't you think David was TERRIFIED to fight Goliath? (I Sam. 17)

The answer is YES, they were all terrified! Just like me, I'm terrified to go to Haiti, alone for 3 weeks. But...I'm doing it anyway! Be sure if the Lord is asking you to do something you don't say no because it is TERRIFYING.


PS. I already have over half of my money and people just found out I am going last week! God is so good!

Until next time...Proverbs 3:5